


What Happened to Perfect?

by blue_meets_green



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bottom Jim, Difficult Decisions, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, Gay Sex, Heavy Angst, Hurt Jim, M/M, Star Trek Beyond, Star Trek Beyond Spoilers, T'hy'la, Top Spock, Vulcan Bond
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-07
Updated: 2017-10-10
Packaged: 2018-08-29 18:51:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 14,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8501326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blue_meets_green/pseuds/blue_meets_green
Summary: After three years into their five year mission, Jim is faced with the fall out in his relationship with Spock. While docked at Yorktown, the pair reflect on decisions they must make when each of them are presented with events which can either drive them further apart or bring them closer together.





	1. Perfect

**Author's Note:**

> Spock and Jim have an established relationship. While being together for over four years, they have yet to formally bond. It is something which has affected Jim that he considers the Vice Admiral position on Yorktown while Spock looks to New Vulcan having received word of Spock Prime's condition. Before either of them can act on their choices, Krall makes his presence known. 
> 
> The inspiration of my story was based on the the song, "What Happened to Perfect?" by Lukas Graham.

 

  


After three years, Jim still felt apprehension as he spoke to various delegates throughout the galaxy. Today was no different, but he knew it should be. Spock has been spending more and more time with his experiments and less time with him.

Jim noticed Spock's change shortly after his premature death in saving the crew and ship from destruction in their battle against Khan. He couldn't believe Bones informing him of Spock going all "cave man" to defeat the monster who killed his 'Sleeping Beauty."

That's what everyone called him as he slept during those two weeks having been given a serum of Khan's blood. When Jim awoke he witnessed tears in his Prince's eyes, filled with emotions of grief, sadness and love. Jim knew it must have broken Spock's heart losing him this way but what he did not know was that it broke Spock's spirit as well.

When Spock realized Jim was alive, he was gratified. His heart rate increased knowing the love of his life was at his side... but for how long? The Vulcan knew it would only be a matter of time before Jim's recklessness would cause him the pain of losing him again. Spock could face any threat in space, any foe; however he could never face losing his James Tiberius Kirk.

For this reason Spock pulls back, shielding his some of his thoughts and emotions from Jim. He tells himself he is not lying to Jim since Vulcans never lie, it is merely an omission.

As Jim stood before the Teenax, he took a deep breath, "Here goes." He thought to himself.

"I am Captain James Tiberus Kirk of the United Federation of Planets. I am appearing before you as a neutral representative of the Fibonan Republic, I bring to you a message of good will. May I present to you esteem members of the Teenaxi delegation a gift from the Fibonan High Council with the highest regard."

After releasing its enclosure, Kirk observes the craving and the innate design of the artifact. It reminds him of two halves joined together as one. It was something he desired in his relationship with Spock. He wanted a formal bonding ceremony, after Khan he found Spock less inclined to do so.

The Captain is roused from his thoughts as one of the delegates speaks.

"What's wrong with it?" One of the Teenax inquires.

“Excuse me.”

Looking toward the Captain and Artifact the Teenax replies, “Well... why don't they want it anymore?'

“This was once a piece of an ancient weapon, now the Fibonans offer it as a symbol of peace. To the Fibonan Republic, to surrender such a weapon is representative as an offer of truce.” Kirk informs the delegates.

 

“How did they come by it?”

“They acquired it a long time ago."

"So they stole it!" The Teenaxi exclaimed.

"No...no.. that is not it." Jim tries to reason with the delegates but before he can explain further the Teenaxi continues with his tirade accusing the Fibonans as nothing more than thieves who will stop at nothing to kill them as they sleep in their beds.

 

Kirk tries further attempts to dis-way the Teexax but not fast enough before the delegate charges down toward the young Star fleet Captain.

Raising his hands in attempt at peace, Jim is astonished to find the Teenaxi is smaller than the size of a small Terrain rabbit. More of the creatures attack Kirk, tearing his clothing and biting his skin.

"Scotty beam me up... beam me up!" Exclaimed Jim.

"That was quick, already done?”

“No, I'm being attacked by a group of the delegation! Get me out of here!”

“A moment Captain, I'm having difficulty distinguishing your pattern from the Teenaxi." Scotty explains.

"Do it now Scotty!"

The Captain materializes on the transporter pad with several Teenaxi on his shoulders and legs. As the security detail remove the delegates off the Captain, Jim steps off the pad and looks toward Scotty.

"So, how did it go?" Scotty asks.

"Perfect...." Jim huffs as he leaves the transporter room.

 

\+ + +

 

  _Moments earlier..._

Spock is in the science labs when he feels Jim's anxiety over having to speak to the Teenaxi delegates through their bond. He is certain Jim will do well in the proceedings, believing Jim is experiencing what humans called "butterflies." It amuses Spock after many years in their service with Star fleet, the Captain still feels the same way when speaking to foreign dignitaries.

He continues with his calculations when he receives word from communications officer Uhura he has a message from New Vulcan. Turning to his station, Spock activates the comm link.

"Greetings young one." Selek tells Spock. "I received your earlier message, I take it you have spoken with Sarek."

"I have spoken with our father at length. He does not understand the logic of foregoing the preservation of your Katra before passing."

"It is my decision Spock. I have lived two lifetimes, one with my mate and the other here... I do not desire to live another lifetime." Selek explains.

Spock stands silent, only nodding in return.

"Now what of you and your mate? We have not heard word of when you both shall be formally bonded. Is Jim reconsidering?" Selik asked.

"I have not discussed the matter with him. In truth, I do not know if he is willing to partake such a ceremony."

Selek laughed. "Spock, it perplexes me to no end how you would believe Jim Kirk... in any universe would decline spending a lifetime with you."

"That is precisely the matter... Jim is human and I will out live him." Spock confesses.

Selek shakes his head, "You must allow Jim to make this choice for himself. Denying him this chance, denies all which you both have experienced together."

Spock is about to answer when he is notified by Lt. Commander Scott of the Captain's prompt return.

Raising his eyebrow his elder counterpart adds, "You have been shielding Jim from your mind, this is not logical Spock. Jim is your mate and it is your duty to protect him as it is his to protect you."

Spock ends the transmission with Spock Prime, departing the science lab to transporter room two expecting to hear how the meeting with the delegation ended.

 

 

 

**BLUE_MEETS_GREEN**

 

 

 


	2. Louder than Words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim is injured in more ways than one, Spock makes a discovery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kudos. I have found writers here who have wonderful stories so when you come across their work, give them kudos or a comment to let them know you appreciate their efforts. Kindness goes a long way. 
> 
> Now on to Chapter 2!

 

As Jim walks out of the transporter room, his hair is disheveled, pulled up at one side while his command uniform is torn at the shoulder and back. He is found carrying his left boot as he is greeted by Doctor McCoy.  
  
“Jim, you look like crap!” Bones informs as he scans the Jim's bio signs.  
  
“Thank you Bones.” He exclaims. “ _Tell me something I don't know_.” He says more to himself. Just as Jim tries to turn the corridor he stumbles.  
  
“Damn it Jim, what did you do this time?”  
  
Just as McCoy is helping Jim to his feet, Spock appears. “ ~~Jim~~... Captain, are you injured? Please allow me to assist Doctor McCoy in taking you to Medical.”  
  
“That's the first damn thing you've said all week I can agree upon Spock.” McCoy snapped.

Jim rests his arms on both Spock and Bones as they guide him to a biobed. While he feels a bit frustrated over the incident, Jim remains silent as Bones scans his leg. He looks up to Spock who seems to be avoiding eye contact at all costs.

“Captain, did you manage to bridge the treaty with the Teenaxi?”  
  
“No Spock I did not, there were complications. The Teenaxi have a long held distrust of the Fibonan Republic, it seems we have our work cut out for us.” Jim replied.  
  
After scanning his leg, “Well Jim, it appears the delegate who attack your leg injured the posterior cruciate ligament. You are going to have remain here for a while.”

As McCoy leaves to get the equipment necessary, Jim and Spock are left alone. Jim feels tension in the room and decides to speaks first.  
  
“Spock, I wish you could tell me why you are shutting me. I can't feel you or your thoughts, do you know how hopeless that sounds?” Jim blurts out.  
  
“I admit my recent work has taken precedence over our time together. I did not believe it would affect you in such a matter. I will endeavor to meditate on the matter, making the necessary adjustments to my schedule to allow for time when we can...”  
  
“Bullshit! You have been telling me for weeks there would time for us. It's like you're inventing projects to be busy with instead of me. Your actions speak louder then words Spock!” Jim raises his arms in defeat. “What happened to the man I met over four years ago in that courtyard the night at the gallery?” Jim pleads.  
  
Spock looks up to face Jim, he feels sadness over treating his mate this way. A part of him wants nothing more than to cradle Jim in his arms holding on to him forever, but they do not have forever with Jim's shorter life span as well as the risk he takes while in command.  
  
“I was a rash young Vulcan who lacked judgement!” Spock declares.  
  
“Whoa.. whoa.. what the shit is going on here?” McCoy asks.  
  
“Doctor, I believe you should ask the Captain as I must report to the bridge.” Spock huffs as he heads out the door.

Bones places his hand on Jim's shoulder. “I have never seen Spock like that before, this is a first. I gotta tell you the whole medical staff could hear you guys.”  
  
“No Bones, it's not the first time Spock has acted this way...” Jim says as he lifts his head up and shuts his eyes.  
  
“You know you have that little vein popping out of your temple again? You okay?”  
  
“Never better, just another day in the Fleet.” Jim huffs.

 

  
+       +      +

 

Spock was aware his behavior was unbecoming of an officer to his superior, worse yet it was unbecoming of a Vulcan to his mate. As Spock entered the turbo lift he was met by Lt. Uhura who was reporting for alpha shift.  
  
Nyota knew in her study of Vulcan culture and language, the mannerisms Vulcans possessed. She was surprised to see her friend in way not seen before. Clearly Spock was angry, his hands were clinched in a fist before him as he leaned forward, opposed to his rigid stance and hands clasped behind his back.

Nyota becomes concerned. “Commander, are you alright?”  
  
Spock ignores her query, trying to shut his eyes to focus and clear his thoughts. She remains silent waiting for him to respond.  
  
“I am fine Lieutenant, there is no reason for concern.” Spock tells her.  
  
“You know, a certain Vulcan friend of mine would state fine has variable definitions.” Nyota remarks.  
  
“Forgive me, I have not been myself as of late. In truth, I have not meditated in the last 2.7 days and require nothing more. I thank you for your concern, Nyota.”  
  
'Well, if you require a friend, please let me know and that goes for Jim too.” She smiles.  
  
The turbo lift doors open, both Uhura and Spock assume their positions on the bridge. Sulu returns to the navigation console as Spock takes the command chair.  
  
Chekov turns toward the command chair, “Commander, ze Kaptain will not be returning to ze bridge?”  
  
“That is affirmative, the captain is currently being treated by Doctor McCoy. I believe he will return shortly after being released from Medical.”  
  
Spock turns to the communications officer, “Lieutenant Uhura, notify Starfleet Headquarters I will be submitting my report on our current situation with regards to the Teenaxi delegation.”  
  
Nodding, “Aye Sir.”  
  
Spock runs his fingers along the armrest of the command chair. Suddenly, he feels alongside it the Captain's P.A.D.D. which evidently was left behind. He makes a mental note to inform Jim of its discovery once he returns to the bridge. As Spock picks up the P.A.D.D. he views it's contents... Jim's application for the Vice Admiral position at Yorktown.  
  
 

 

 

**BLUE_MEETS_GREEN**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I enjoy angst and I have no problem writing it about Loki, Captain America or the Avengers, however I find it challenging when it comes to writing an angered Spock. I hope I did well. Again thank you all for following the story.


	3. Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spock's reaction to the discovery of Jim's application for Vice Admiral is seen while Jim tries to unwind and forget this troubles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments and kudos. I am glad many of you enjoy the story and cover art as well.

 

“ **Captain' Log Stardate 2263.2...**  
**  
** "After a brief interlude with the Teenax delegation, it is my opinion their distrust of the Fibonan Republic will not change at present. Before talks can be resumed, the Teenaxis concerns must be addressed. I will seek another opportunity to discuss with them further that it is in their best interest for acceptance into the Federation if they can agree on terms with the Fibonans. For more on our...dalliance with the Teenaxi, see my personal log.”  
  
Sitting at his desk, the Captain ends his log entry as takes a sip of his coffee. Wrapping his palms then fingers around the cup, he feels the warmth it gives. It's the warmth which attracts Jim's interest, always feeling cold against everything else except for his deep feelings for his mate. Spock confessed to Jim it was the touch of his skin and warmth had been a comfort to the Vulcan, giving him a feeling of being grounded, safe and loved. Jim took comfort in Spock's arms and love, however it seemed coffee was one thing that had been comforting to him these days as he could take little comfort in his mate. Jim ponders on where everything was going wrong and tries to make sense of it all.

Meanwhile, on the bridge Spock felt discontent over discovering ~~his captain~~ , his mate had made a decision without his knowledge which could affect them both. Spock was aware Jim had experienced some dissatisfaction with the last several missions the Enterprise had been sent on, all diplomatic negotiations... none were explorations of seeking out new life. It was the young explorer in Jim that desired to fly and discover what was beyond the stars.  
  
Spock's thoughts went back to Jim's application. How could Jim decide to take a position which neither garnered exploration or missions in the vastness of space?

Lieutenant Uhura was working on incoming communications when she heard a snap. Turning to ask the Commander about the noise, Nyota refrained from speaking when she viewed the broken stylus in the Vulcan's hand.  


  
+         +         +  
  
  


Sitting in one of the ship's lounges alone nursing his drink, Jim knows it's the first he's had in months. He cannot face Spock, not now. Feeling through their bond Spock has lifted his shields and Jim's mind is filled with emotions of dread, anger and resentment. _"Good at least, now he's fucking sending me something."_ Jim tells himself as he drowns the shot.  
  
As Jim is setting down his drink, McCoy enters with a bottle in hand. "Thought you'd here kid."  
  
"You a mind reader now, Doctor?" Jim huffs.  
  
"Hell no, leave that Mumbo Jumbo to your green blooded hobgoblin. I just know things after being your roommate for over three years. Besides what kind of friend would I be letting a man drown his sorrows alone?"  
  
Raising his glass, "You're a good man Bones."

"Damn right!" He nods to Jim.  
  
Picking up the flask of alcohol, "Now what the hell are you drinking?" Bones announced.  
  
"Ahhh, I'm pretty sure its what's left of that Saurian Brandy we picked up at the last outpost."  
  
Removing it away from Jim. "What were you thinking? You wanna go blind? That stuff is illegal, besides I've got something better."  
  
"Like what?"  
  
Holding up a bottle of scotch, "Now this I found in the oddest of places... Chekov's locker. Had to confiscate it, you know me being the Chief Medical Officer.. I can't have the crewman reporting unfit for duty. What kind of doctor would I be if I left Chekov in such a predicament?"  
  
"You'd be a very bad doctor." Jim slurs.  
  
"I know right?"  
  
Jim raises his eyebrows, "Wow scotch? I had pegged Chekov for a ..."  
  
"Vodka man right?" Bones adds.  
  
Putting the bottle down to open it as Jim retrieves the shot glasses. "I wanted to have something appropriate for your birthday."  
  
"It's in a couple of days, you know I don't care about that." The younger man confesses.

"I know Jim. I suppose it's no consolidation being born on the day your Pa bit the dust."  
  
"You and your Southern charm doctor, you're lucky I hooked up with Spock first otherwise it could have been you." Jim smirks.  
  
"Don't tempt me Jim, with your baby blue eyes and that bum of yours."  
  
Jims starts to laugh, "That's funny... but true. Lord knows you've seen it enough as my friend and doctor.”  
  
Tapping their glasses together against a third glass in the middle on the counter, they take a swig of their drinks and both men utter, "Oh yea.. lordy."  
  
Composing himself, Jim becomes serious."  
  
"One year older, a year older than he got to be... my Dad joined Starfleet because he believed in it. I joined on a dare."  
  
"You joined to see if you could live up to him, you spent all this time trying to figure out what it meant to be George Kirk and now you're wondering what it means to be Jim, why you're out here."  
  
Raising his glass to Jim's, "To perfect eyesight and a full head of hair."  
  
Drinking his drink then setting it down, "You gonna call your Mom and Sam?"  
  
"Of course I'll call them that day. Did I tell you Sam and Aurelan are having a baby?  
  
"So you're gonna be an Uncle? When are you and Spock gonna have Spocklets? Sulu and Ben have their little girl through the male carrier program. You still young Jim..."  
  
"Enough Bones, I don't want to discuss it. Spock and I have enough problems to contend, adding someone else would just compound everything especially now."  
  
"I thought you and the Vulcan had patched things up, it's not like Spock and you to remain distant. Look kid, I'm sorry if I overstepped the bounds of friendship."  
  
"Never Bones, you're my best buddy. Come here, you old prick."

 

Pulling the doctor toward him, Jim embraces Bones in a bear hug. "Thanks man for being there for me."  
  
"You know kid I would do anything for you Jim.. within sound reasoning."  
  
"Be still my heart... if only a certain Vulcan would do the same."  
  
"Unhand my mate!" Spock demanded.  
  
"Speak of the Devil..." Bones exclaimed. “Now look Spock it isn't what it looks like. Jim's like a little brother to me and I'm here as a friend.  
  
Jim lets go of Bones and turns toward Spock waving his hand, "Oh hi Asham, Asha, Ashyum, aw shit ~~Spirk~~.. Spock how to do ~~slur~~ say that again?  
  
'The word is Ashayam" Spock clarifies.  
  
"yea thanks, because I'll have you know it's very ~~hurd~~... hard to speak Vulcan when..."  
  
"You are intoxicated." Spock states.  
  
"Exactly." Jim says before he passes out.

 

 

 

**BLUE_MEETS_GREEN**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt some the need to show Bones and Jim's side of friendship before some angst as we shall see in the next chapter. Spock will have words with Jim no doubt.


	4. Desire and Denial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim regains the one thing he thought was non existent in his relationship with Spock, but at what cost?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I put in a lot of thought on how I wanted to set up the scene. Let's hope my idea worked. 
> 
> Warning: heavy sex and some angst coming your way.

Jim sucks in a breath and slowly releases it out, relaxing in the arms around him, his eyes falling closed. The throbbing pain in his temples further jars him awake as he groaned, a hypo spray at his neck quickly subsides it.  
  
"Feeling better?"  
  
The question was asked quietly as it helps Jim trust the person he is currently sitting with until he realizes what happened. Jim tenses immediately, slowly pushing away from Spock.  
  
'Spock I....”  
  
'There is nothing to say... my concern is your well being.”

“You mean because I'm your Captain.” Jim sighs.  
  
“As your first officer, however I am not here in that capacity. You are my mate therefore it is my duty to see you unharmed.

Jim does not know how to reply to his words. It a small way he is happy Spock chose to remain at his side, holding on to him. Jim looks down, too frightened to face Spock to look eyes into those chocolate brown ones looking back into blue. Jim is worried of the judgment that is sure to come because of his behavior the night before. Jim bites his lower lip hard enough to draw blood and a small sound of pain escapes him.  
  
"Jim?"  
  
Jim flinches slightly when a Spock's thumb brushes against his lip, wiping away the small bubble of blood forming on it, and slowly Jim opens his eyes. Looking into Spock's eyes, surprised to see worry instead of judgment in them.  
  
The intensity of Spock's expression causes his heart racing, his breath catches in his throat and Jim can't look away no matter how hard he'd try.

"Ashayam.." Placing a hand on Jim's cheek with such tenderness then bringing his hands on the his mate's neck.

Gathering courage Jim looks up, his eyes widen slightly at the touch, his skin heating up where Spock's hand is, and after a few seconds of silence he nods. "I'm fine," he whispers as one of his own hands moves to close around Spock's wrist.

Sock leans forward slightly and looks into Jim's wide blue eyes, seeking approval.

Jim nods and swallows. "Yes."

Quickly Spock pulls his mate into an embrace, pressing his lips to Jim's. The Vulcan's tongue brushing against Jim' lips pushing for entrance. Jim parts his lips and Spock is there, their tongues dancing a dance neither has forgotten.

The Vulcan's fingers gliding over any expanse of skin for contact. Jim shutters at his touch. His Vulcan mate taking time to map every contour of Jim's body, hands caressing and grasping in an effort to hold on to the human as if he were to fly away.

Jim's kisses become frantic, its been a long time in waiting for moments like this. He tells himself he won't question it, he'll take whatever Spock can give him. He'll deal with the aftermath later, right now he just wants Spock.. to touch, to feel, to love and be connected.

Spock returns his kisses softly, cradling Jim's face in his hands before pressing his weight against him and assaulting his mate's mouth again. Spock moves his hands and grips Jim's shoulders. Disengaging from the kiss, Spock bites down on Jim's neck earning a moan from the pinned man.

Jim focuses on the mixture of pain and passion from the bite. Knowing it is something done repeatedly during their couplings. To know he is marked by Spock this way, makes him shutter with emotion.

Spock lets go, releasing his mate as he discards clothing then resuming to capture Jim's lips. Jim is internally thankful for the little clothing he is wearing, less of a barrier for sex. He relaxes against Spock and instinctively wraps his legs around him, bringing the Vulcan closer.  
  
Feeling Spock's hands roam his thighs, Jim breaths in a hitch relishing the Vulcan's attention to detail. Within moments Jim feels Spock's coated fingers massaging his backside, then slowly his entrance until one finger was inserted. Spock growled before slipping his finger through the tight ring of muscle. As a second finger was added, scissoring and stretching him, Jim's face displayed a slight twinge of discomfort at the intrusion but the pain quickly subsides.  
  
When a third finger is added, Jim finds he cannot wait any longer and presses back forcing Spock's fingertips to brush against him. He squeezes his eyes and moans as Spock began to pump his fingers in and out, the Vulcan feeling the tight ring of muscle contracting around his fingers and then loosening.

Jim heaves a sigh of relief when Spock removes his fingers and aligns himself across Jim's entrance. He watched as Spock's eyes darken with desire. His hands move to settle on Jim's hips, fingers digging into pliant flesh.

Spock forced himself halfway allowing his mate to adjust then he fully sheathed himself within the inviting hole, unable to resist his urges any longer. Cupping one hand to Jim's face gently as the human tilted his head back in ecstasy. Jim slowly allowed himself to relax as Spock began to move within him. The Vulcan's hands once again trailed down toward his hips, gripping them in a almost feral motion before thrusting harder.

Jim moaned his mate's name over and over like a chant more to himself than to Spock. Perhaps it was to remind him this was real and not a dream. Gripping Spock's hair, burying his face into the jet black locks, Jim cries out another moan. Spock briefly pulls out much to his mate's whimper before he thrusts back in, angling himself to hit Jim' s prostate. The Vulcan moans as Jim gasps.

“Harder.” Jim moans, as he holds onto Spock. His Vulcan complies by pulling out before roughly slamming back into him. With each thrust, the pleasure overwhelms Jim. He digs his nails into Spock's back as the thrusts become more erratic. Spock reached between them and begins stroking Jim's cock which is fully hard beading precum at the spongy tip, he strokes Jim in tune to his movements.

The sounds of his mate's moans and disjointed words were music to Vulcan's ears as he continued his assault. Jim tenses, tilting his head in ecstasy as his release spills over Spock's hand. Spock moved his hands to grip Jim's hips once again as he drove himself inside as far as Jim's body allowed him. A few thrusts later and Spock shouted his own release, feeling himself spill his seed deep within Jim.

With his mate still clutching him, Jim moves a hand to Spock's in an effort to place the Vulcan's fingertips at his temple. Jim wants to feel move than just Spock's body, he desires his mind as well. Spock flinches back, resisting any moment which would entail melding with his mate. Jim grabs Spock's wrist again, feeling the Vulcan's shielding and nothing more.

“Why?”

“Jim… please understand..”

“Understand what? That you're willing to share your body with me but not your mind?

Spock looked to his mate. "I do not understand the significance, for what purpose?"  
  
Jim sits up. “Spock, we have always melding during or after out coupling. I'm your mate or have you forgotten that?”

“I am aware you are my mate, I apologize as I have been distracted as of late.”

“You do realize you avoided by first question? Why won't you meld with me? I know we're not formally bonded but that's never stopped you before Spock. I can't feel you in my head and it's a loss I can't live without. I love you Spock, if it's because we're not married by Vulcan law, we can remedy that”

Spock pulls away. "Ashayam, please understand it is more than that.. a bond between mates, shared forever . You are human and…”

Jim slaps Spock across his jaw. “You sick bastard. All these years being together. Was I just some whore you took up with to satisfy your desires but when the real time came for you to bond, it was going to be with one of your own?”

Spock tries to explain. “That is untrue. You misinterpret the context of my actions. Do not assume you know my people!”

“I may not know everything about Vulcan's but I know the one facing me and you are deliberately keeping out of your head. Afraid of what I'll find out?”

Just as Jim tries to leave their bed, Spock pulls him back forcefully. “Let me go Spock!”

His Vulcan hands gripping onto Jim's wrists."You are mine!"

"I'm not your property Spock. We belong to one another. Right now I can't deal with this."

Spock attempts to wrap his arms around Jim's waist grounding him to his side. Jim pulls ways before he can and Spock pulls his wrists back. “You're hurting me Spock!”

Spock refrains from releasing Jim. He doesn't hear Jim's pleading, his cries of pain at his hands. All he can hear is own heartbeat race in the the fear of letting Jim go.

Meanwhile Bones arrives outside the door of their quarters check on Jim. Jim failed to contact him earlier and the good doctor just wanted to make sure his friends was alright.  Panic sets in as he hears Jim's cries and shouts. Using his medical override code, the doctor enters.

'What the hell?”  
  
Bones takes in the scene, viewing Jim sitting on the edge of his bed wrapped in his bed sheet cradling his right wrist as Spock cups his own jaw. Neither man is speaking and Bones can clearly feel the tension in the room.  
  
The doctor moves to Jim slowly, unable to tell if this is a result of Spock's Pon Farr or not. When he sees Jim's wrist and the tears in his friend's eyes he sets whatever questions he has aside.  
  
“Come on Jim, let's get you to Medical..”

Spock looks up to Jim facing the gravity of what he has done.  
  

 

 

**BLUE_MEETS_GREEN**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this leaned toward angst at the end, but you have to remember this story is about the fallout of their relationship before their reconciliation.  
> Also worth noting: Spock is not in Pon farr.


	5. Face Forward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bones advices his friend and captain, Spock and Jim face each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its been quite here with feedback, but I can only assume it’s due to the Holiday season. I am still moving forward.

“Sit still Jim, I'll get the scanner.”

“Why didn't we just go to Medical?”

"Yeah well after thinking about it, I figured a little discretion was a good thing. The last thing you need is a cause for alarm with the crew, besides it will give us time to talk."

"Talk about what?.. so I had a little rough sex with my boyfriend.”

 "Come off it Jim, we both know that wasn't an accident. Your wrist is broken, those indentions into your skin are more than bruising. Now I can get a dermal generator and fix this but what I can't do is fix what's going on between you and your hemoglobin.”

Jim rubs the back of his neck with his unbroken hand. He knew his friend was right even if he didn't want to admit it. For months Spock had been distancing himself from their relationship, it felt as if the Vulcan was running on autopilot except when performing his duties as first officer.

"Jim, I can't disassociate myself as your friend and just see this as your CMO. Lord knows I try when it comes to you but you're Jim Kirk and my friend."

"Tell me something I don't know Bones.” 

 "Well I could lecture you but what my guess is you didn’t see this coming. If you want I can run up a battery of tests on Spock, maybe it will tell us something. If it doesn’t at least he’ll be out of your hair for awhile.”

“Thanks Bones.” 

As he sat waiting for the remaining bone to heal, Jim's comm link signals an incoming message from the bridge. “Kirk here.” 

“Captain, we have received a word from the Teenaxi delegation. They send their sincerest apologies and have sent word the delegates have chosen a intermediary to represent their interests. Their representative wishes to come aboard the Enterprise to conduct a formal talks between yourself and senior officers.”

‘Thank you Uhura, please inform all senior bridge officers to report within the hour. We need to discuss any formalities necessary if we are going to bridge the gap to get the treaty settled before Teenaxi membership into the Federation can be considered. Kirk out.” 

“I guess Spock’s medical tests are going to have to wait." Jim informs Bones. 

“You think you’re doing the right thing?” Bones asks.

“I am not sure but if I know Spock, he won't risk his duties as first officer. He may suck as a boyfriend right now, but he’s still the best first officer in the fleet and I would be stupid to side line him during this.”

"You’re the Captain…Jim.”

“So everyone tells me." 

 

\+       +        +

 

All senior officers among the bridge and some representing various departments were present for the meeting, including Commander Spock. Jim knew Spock would set aside any differences they had to report for duty regardless. Perhaps it was Vulcan trait to place such a mask of calmness when Jim had faced something else entirely not long ago.

Allowing his first officer to explain the situation at length, Jim remains silent contemplating his thoughts on Spock. He wants to give the Vulcan the benefit of the doubt in injuring his wrist but he can't allow what has been going on for months to go unnoticed and worse yet ignored. He decides to wait on confronting Spock until this matter with the Teenaxi is settled. Once Spock has concluded his presentation, he turns to Jim waiting for his response.

Setting aside his own feelings, Jim places his best face forward and addresses the group. “I take it everyone has read my report so I'll be brief. I am sure you understand the importance of this meeting between the representative of the Teenaxi, myself and a number of senior officers aboard this ship.  I won’t lecture you on diplomacy as we all know any cultural differences can be taken incorrectly, leading to misrepresentation not only of ourselves but reflect on the Federation as well. I expect every officer and crewmen on this ship to act according. There are to be no excuses. Dismissed.” 

As everyone leaves the room, only the Captain and First Officer remain behind. 

“I said dismissed Commander.” 

“Permission to speak with you on a personal matter.”

“If it’s about us, I don’t want to hear it Spock.” Jim states. 

 “Ashayam"

"No, you don’t get to call me that, after you’ve been shielding yourself from me for months, and then just when I think you’ve come back to me… you refuse to meld with me… your mate.”

“Jim…please.” Spock moves to grab Jim by the arms to pull him close but the younger man steps back. 

“Fuck you Spock. I hate fucking hate you right now. I hate that I love you and you do this to me.  I deserve a hell of a lot better than to be strung along these years…”

Spock cuts in, “I did not lead you astray, I meant it when I professed my love for you all those years ago. I cherish you for you are my other half, you are what completes me.” 

“Then why don’t I feel complete, hell I feel like a shell of a man in the storm of my life without a compass to even know where I am going!” You made it clear, you don’t want to formally bond with a human. Why bother being with me at all.”

“You do not mean that Jim.”

“How would you know, you’ve shielded yourself from me, how’s that for your fucking logic Spock.” 

As Jim leaves the room, Spock considers forcing Jim to listen so he can reassure his love is genuine however he lets Jim leave for now hoping he can convince his beloved that he is wrong before his mate escapes from his life for good.

 

 

**BLUE_MEETS_GREEN**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I planned for a longer chapter but felt the meeting with the representative for the Teenaxi could wait until the next chapter.


	6. Preparations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone is in preparation for the arrival of the Emissary while Spock views the past that's not his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been awhile since I updated with a new chapter. I have six current works (five Star trek works and one Marvel) which I need to keep track of so my plan is to update all this week if possible.

Jim was over seeing the plans for greeting the emissary and delegation chosen to arrive. He was informed an Emissary Ardana would be representing the Tennaxi's interests, chosen for his skill and objective manner in negotiations.

Jim was not pleased that the Teenaxi felt it necessary to bring in another party to discuss any further plans to settle disputes between the Teenaxi and the Fenopian Republic but he understood their hesitation in signing any treaty after years of dispute between both species.

Jim was chosen to continue as a neutral representative of the Fibonan Republic grateful they still had belief in him despite the unfortunate incident with the Teenaxi earlier. The Captain felt he should have been informed of the Teexaxi's distrust of the Fibonans beforehand but that was here nor there at this point, what's done is done according to Jim. He promised himself he was not going to dwell on the past when it came to this meeting.

What he did dwell on was on how things had become stagnant between himself and Spock, aside from their recent coupling. Jim felt trapped by the weight of dealing with Spock's constant detachment and distance all these months and when he finally felt a spark between them, the Vulcan pushed away from sharing his thoughts. Jim believes if he cannot have Spock in both mind and body, he would rather have nothing at all.  Feeling conflicted by his own thoughts and feelings, Jim decides to hold off making any decision until this meeting with the Emissary and delegation is over and both parties make an agreement over the treaty. 

Meanwhile Spock was on his end in the ship's vault reviewing all necessary information on how the Artifact could have been misinterpreted by the Teenaxi. Both he and the Captain were assured the Artifact posed no threat and it would have received as a token of peace between both parties. Spock considered for a moment the possibility the Captain failed to present the information as it was given but then quickly dismissed the idea as he knew Jim would not have misinformed the delegation.

Reviewing copies of manuscripts provided by the Fibonan Republic, Spock learned the artifact had been one of three that were discovered a millennia ago. The Fibonans society organized themselves socially and politically into regional, district, and village chiefdoms as recorded in some early records.  Believing that a chief, or “cacique,” the highest ranking member of the society, provided a conduit for communication between the physical and spiritual world. 

Over the subsequent decades, disease, warfare, famine, and enslavement brought about the destruction of the chiefdoms and almost completely annihilated the population of the Fibonan Republic.

By contrast, the Teenaxi did not share the belief in dual aspects of creation. The realm of invisible causal reality was a mystery to them and what they did not understand, they feared.

While the Teenaxi may have been considered as cavemen in the dark without the "discovery of fire" to some, they were not to be underestimated. Family was considered sacred and the characteristics of good, prudent and noble were viewed in high regard.

They were a warrior race which had survived far longer than any other world in the quadrant. It was their tenacity to overcome obstacles is what the drew Fibonans' interest in forming an alliance.

The Federation believed the both species are especially important because they represent a societies undergoing rapid sociopolitical change and becoming more complex through time. Spock was unsure on how two opposing views could come to an agreement without difficulty, perhaps bringing in an emissary could prove to be prudent in this matter after all.

Making notations on what he believes will be important in the discussions, Spock moves to place the artifact back for cataloging. Before he does, his mind is bombarded with images of the past...images not his own then all is dark.

 

\+        +       +

 

When Jim was notified Spock was in medical, he did not hesitate to leave his post after having Sulu take command while he left the bridge. Part of him was worried for his mate while the other half was upset that he could not feel Spock's condition. Had their telepathic link remained opened, Jim believed he would have known Spock was in trouble.

Before stepping in to the med bay, Jim decides not to confront Spock about why he continues to shield, rather he wants to know if his mate is well. Spock is still unconscious when Jim sits by his side.

McCoy approaches, “Well Jim, I've run every test I can think of, there's no injury I can see other than the fact he was out for at least 12 minutes before his condition was discovered.”

“If he is not injured, why is he still unconscious? I want answers Bones.”

 “All I can tell you is it must be a part of his Vulcan biology. Take for example, Vulcans have an inner eyelid which prevents certain types of high intensity light from harming their eyes. Now think about the Vulcan mind, specifically the healing trance, we can assume what ever affected Spock must have set off something in him to prevent any harm which resulted in him being in his present condition.”

“For how long?”

“Heck if I know, what I do know is Spock is not in any danger, his vitals are good. All we can do is wait.”

“Wait? We have a treaty hanging in the balance with an emissary that's due to arrive in 4 hours. Jim sighs, “ I don't know how to wear two hats right now, whether act as his captain or mate. I am so confused Bones, I don't know if I am coming or going half the time.”

“Jim I get it with all this mess on this mission and your personal life weighing in on the side it's no wonder I haven't see you laying in this med bay and not Spock. Don't worry about Spock, I know you still care for him even if he's messed up some things. Now, I'll leave you to your Vulcan."

“Thanks Bones.” Jim nods.

As the doctor leaves Jim alone with Spock, he views his mate. Spock's chest rises with each intake of breath, Jim is relieved and grateful Spock is unharmed. He notes Soock's face shows a youthfulness that Jim hasn't seen for sometime. They have not been sharing a bed for the last several weeks with different schedules it's no wonder Jim had forgotten the peacefulness of Spock in sleep...how his lips curl slightly, his eyelids moving ever so often and his hair disheveled about his face.

Jim hides a giggle he hadn't thought would emerge in months. He takes Spock's hand in his and takes a deep breath.

“I'm here Spock, not as your Captain but as your mate, as the man who loves you and will continue to love you as long as you'll have me. Please wake up, I miss the banter, I miss your voice dispelling my nightmares, I miss your arms around me holding me, grounding me.. I miss you my beloved. Please come back to me.”

Placing his lips against Spock's cheek, Jim whispers, “Wani ra yana ro aisha” (I love you).

 

 

BLUE_MEETS_GREEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love reading about history so when I can show it in writing, I try to research what I can to make things seem factual even though this is fiction, folks. The information on the Fenopian Republic, I borrowed from Dominican Republic specifically native cultures inhabiting the islands of the Caribbean while the information on Teenaxi, I created from my own imagination.
> 
> My idea for Jim to set aside his anger when Spock was injured came from an incident early on in my marriage when my spouse and I had a quarrel and later that day he was hit by a car. In the hospital all my anger was forgotten when I saw him. I imagined Jim would have felt the same way, seeing Spock.


	7. The Emissary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim is surprised in more ways than one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am glad everyone was pleased Jim still cares for Spock. Let's hope things can progress smoothly for awhile.

When the captain was notified the Emissary was due to board the Enterprise, he found himself reluctant to leave his first officer's side. More importantly Jim would have preferred to remain by Spock's side where Edith Keeler once mentioned where they belonged. 

Jim reflects on the woman's words when they lived for a short time during Earth's early twentieth century to retreive Doctor McCoy.

_Edith Keeler points toward the pair, “I still have questions I'd like to ask about you two. Oh, and don’t give me that 'questions about little old us' look. You know as well as I do how out of place you two are around here.”_

_Spock raised an eyebrow, not wanting to devulge their true relationship among these humans. “Where would you estimate we belong Miss Keeler?"_

_“You Mr. Spock, at his side… as if you've always been there and always will.”_

Jim lowered his head, “She was right you know, you belong at my side. I can't imagine my life without you Spock. I don't even know how I manage before we met, but I'm glad we did." 

Jim looks at his Prince, eyelids closed in deep slumber.  He views the angles of Spock's face, high cheek bones and tapered ears. In this condition, his mate appears so tranquil unlike his demeanor of the last several weeks. 

Brushing a strand of hair, Jim wonders what if anything had set off Spock. He hopes whatever it was...is now behind them.

Bones approaches Jim, laying a hand on his shoulder. “It's okay Jim, I'll make sure to notify you the moment he wakes.”

“Thanks, Bones.” Jim hesitates a brief moment before leaving, running his fingers against Spock's face. He hopes things can only get better from now on.

Placing a kiss on his mate's temple, “Be well my love.”

When the Captain entered the transporter room, all crewmen were at attention, awaiting orders to have the Emissary beamed abroad. Jim wore his crisp gold dress tunic, never mind he felt uncomfortable donning it because this was an important meeting. Apparently the Teenaxi held high regard in the these matters and saw to it their Emissary would be entitled to the same treatment as the royal family. 

Jim wondered why there was so little mentioned of who and where the representative was from. 

Nodding to the crewman, He awaits as the Emissary materializes on the transport pad. Jim is surprised and elated as he views an old friend. 

 

\+       +       +

 

 As Spock awoke, he felt disoriented at first then recognized his surroundings once Doctor McCoy stood over him monitoring vitals. 

“Well, Spock you sure gave Jim a fright.” 

“It was not my intention to do so.” 

As Spock tried to sit up, he was assisted by McCoy. “Slow down there Spock, no reason to rush your recovery. We found you unconscious in the ship's vault. According to computers, you were out for approximately 12 minutes.  Care to tell me what you remember?” 

“Doctor where is the Captain?” 

“He's greeting the Emissary boarding the Enterprise. Now tell me Spock what happened?” 

“I must speak with him, I will not devulge the information otherwise.” 

“As chief Medical Officer I can order you but something tells me you won't budge.  Suit yourself Spock, there's no telling how long it will be before he returns.” 

“I understand Doctor, please inform the Captain.” 

 

\+        +       +

 

 When the Emissary stepped off the platform, the Captain stood tall.

“Welcome abroad the Enterprise.” 

The representative nods and follows him as they exit the transporter room. Together they enter the turbo lift. 

Dark stormy grey eyes met the Captain's Bombay sapphire blue.  Sending an apologetic expression toward Jim, “Forgive me Captain at my discretion, it could not be helped as the importance of both the Teenaxi and Fibonan Republic weighs heavy in the balance.” 

Nodding, “I understand representative Troi.

“It's Ambassador now, James and don't be so formal.” He grins. 

“Adren, why wasn't I informed it was you?"

“”What was I to say? A past dalliance was coming aboard for peace talks. No way Jim, these talks are much too important. Besides I was not sure you would agree to meet, that it why I presented myself as Ardana..it was my mother's surname and you would not have known.” 

“It would not have mattered, the past is the past. You should know as the Captain of this ship I take all matters seriously.” 

Smiling and taking in Jim for a hug, “Oh I don't know. Last time I saw James Kirk, he was a young rebel of a cadet hoping to explore the stars and still have time for adventure.” 

“I'm still that but just a bit older and wiser.” Jim smirks as they exit the turbo lift and walk toward a briefing room. 

“Well the years gave certain made you quite a beholding sight Jim. A little rougher on the edges but I still see that young cadet I met years ago with an old soul.”

Jim blushes, “Now Adren, I can't have you flattering me throughout these whole proceedings. Tell me why you're here on behalf on the Teenaxi?” 

Sitting down the Emissary looks troubled. “The Teenaxi believe the gift the Fibonan Republic sent knew it would be received as an insult. There are talks there is a small faction of the Republic who are against a treaty. Apparently some do not favor admission into the Federation to follow this agreement between both sides.” 

“It doesn't make sense. Both parties would benefit with such a treaty. Star Fleet protocol dictates any world seeking application with the Federation must adhere to a non aggression pact between other neighboring parties.” 

“Exactly Captain as the person or persons involved in sending the artifact were aware of the intent of such a response you would receive from the Teenaxi thereby causing further dissention between both worlds.” Spock stated as he entered the room. 

Jim turns around grabbing Spock by his forearms, spinning the Vulcan. “Spock you're well!” 

Adren smiles, “Your ship must be very fortunate her Captain takes such an interest in the health the crew.” 

Jim blushes, “This Commander Spock, my first officer.” 

Nodding, “Ambassador.”

“You were ill Commander?” 

“I was indisposed for several minutes after further examining the artifact in question.” 

Jim appears concerned, he is relieved to find Spock's shields lifted. Using the bond Jim communicates his thoughts to Spock.   


_**What happened?** _

_**“I encountered a residual imprint from the artifact. It showed me images of places and the species which created it.”** _

_**“Did you gain anything from it.”** _

_**“Nothing without further study with it.** _

_**“No Spock, I won't let you. You were hurt once, what if it happens again?”** _

The Emissary stands, Tell me James, why is it I was unable to get you to settle down but this fellow did?” 

Spock clinches his hand at the words spoken, apparently this individual was apparently someone from Jim's past and an empath as well. 

 

 

 

 

BLUE_MEETS_GREEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I left the chapter here as I plan on continuing their discussion in the next chapter. No doubt Spock will have questions regarding the Emissary as will Jim have regarding the artifact and who is set against the treaty.
> 
> For those wondering I used Jake Stormoen from the Mythica movies as inspiration for the character of the Emissary.


	8. Suspicion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spock seems off during the talks, Jim is concerned with the outcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the last chapter Spock seems to have recovered from his encounter with the artifact however there are some residual effects.

 

Spock ignored the Ambassador's remark, he was representing himself as the Captain's first officer and not as Jim's mate. The individual before him was a guest aboard the Enterprise and a neutral intermediary sworn to proceed with both parties interest.

Spock listened as the Ambassador spoke, the man's eyes raking over Jim as if he were a delicacy. The Vulcan knew the Emissary was using restraint in dealing with the Captain, choosing to focus on the treaty. It of importance to both parties involved as well as the Federation.  
  
Spock knew Jim had several previous sexual exploits before they meet during his academy days. Though they never spoke much of it, Spock knew from their mind meld, Jim's past and his mate knew his own. Unguarded through the bond except for some of Jim's experiences on Tarsus were treated as privacy and regarded as something Jim would open up to one day. Spock would never dwell on it, he respected his mate's decision to shield that part of him.

To find that this individual held some merit in Jim's past without his mate ever disclosing it, caused Spock some form of distress. He wondered what other secrets his mate held from him. It was not like Spock have such thoughts regarding Jim however for sometime since the Enterprise took on the task of overseeing an alliance between the Teenaxi and Fibonan Republic, the Vulcan found himself at odds mentally.

Meditation grew less productive, sleep became non existent and the only way Spock felt anyway at all was during his recent coupling with Jim. _To think that perhaps this man, the Ambassador may have touched his Th'y'la gave Spock cause to…_

“Commander, would you please provide your thoughts on the matter?” The Ambassador spoke.

“Forgive me, please clarify.”  
  
Jim looked at Spock with surprise, never he Spock been caught off guard during such diplomatic discussions. It was unlike Spock but then again his mate had been so unlike himself recently.  
  
“Spock, I thought Doctor McCoy cleared you fit for duty?”  
  
“I took it upon myself to deem my condition well enough to assist you Captain.”

“James, I am sure we can conclude these talks sometime after we dine...besides it has been a long day for me. I must retire.”  
  
“I will see to it you are escorted to your quarters Ambassador. We will see you at 1800 hours.”  
  
As a yeoman comes to escort the Ambassador out of the briefing room, he comes to embrace Jim once again.  
  
“It has been good to see you James, I look forward to this evening. Oh and Commander I hope you will be well enough for this evening's festivities.”

Spock simply nodded in return.  
  
  
  
+       +      +  
  
  
Once the Ambassador left to his guest quarters, Jim wasted no time questioning Spock.  
  
“Do you want to tell me what's going on Spock? It is not like you to forget information especially during an important meeting, that's my job if you recall.”  
  
“Forgive me, perhaps I am unable to continue my duties for the remainder of the day. Perhaps it would be best for you to catch up as it were with your guest.”

Jim moves closer to Spock, “If I didn't know any better I'd say you were jealous. There is nothing to be jealous about. Adren is in the past, you are my present. It does matter where we came from, we're here right now.”  
  
“Why did you not inform me?” Spock looked into Jim's eyes.  
  
“Spock, I didn't know it was him, as you recall we were both told an Emissary Ardana was to board. How was I to know Adren was using his mother's surname? Adren explained to me he was not sure I would agree to meet him otherwise.”

Spock seemed satisfied with his explanation. “I am gratified that there is no animosity between us Ashayam. I was taken aback by his favor upon you, it was displeasing to say the least viewing of his behavior toward you.”  
  
“I don't know whether to take that as a complement of your favor toward me or be taken aback by your candor Mr. Spock.” Jim said a little too affectionately as he played with Spock's ear.  
  
Raising an eyebrow, Spock's lip curled showing the slightest display of a grin. Anyone else would not have noticed it, but Jim did.  
  
“Now Doctor McCoy said you had some information to share regarding the artifact.”  
  
   
  
+        +        +

 Spock proceeded to sit down, his body feeling the sensations of vertigo. Jim moved toward him concerned that perhaps all was not well with Spock.  
  
“Are you alright, should I inform Doctor McCoy?”  
  
“No it will pass.”  
  
“Very well."  Jim replied then waited a few minutes until Spock gave him notification to continue.

"Spock what can you tell me about the incident just before you blacked out? Do you remember anything, even it is seems insignificant?”  
  
“I was reviewing all necessary information on how the Artifact could have been misinterpreted by the Teenaxi. I viewed copies of manuscripts provided by the Fibonan Republic.”

“What did you learn?”  
  
"I discovered learned the artifact had been one of three that were found a millennia ago. It may not have been created by the Fibonans themselves. The artifact itself predates any historical data recorded. There is little said of it, except that it was used in ceremony by the village chiefdom who believed the item provided a conduit when used with an individual for communication between the physical and spiritual world.”  
  
“But if they didn't know why or how it was created, why take that risk? It could have backfired on them and caused catastrophic events if used incorrectly.”  
  
“I believe it may have been used incorrectly, as noted in early records over the subsequent decades after it's use... disease, warfare, famine, and enslavement brought about the destruction of the chiefdom and almost completely annihilated the population of the Fibonan Republic.”  
  
“So do you think whomever chose this artifact to give to the Teenaxi knew if they had accepted it and subsequently used it, the same would befall them?”

“It is possible, however there maybe other motives.”

“How much more information were you able to extract?” Jim questioned.  
  
“I was unable to decipher any more information after placing the artifact back for cataloging. As I attempted to do so, my mind was bombarded with images not my own.”  
  
“What kind of images?”  
  
“The past I believe.”  
  
“Of the Fibonans?'  
  
'No, it was of another race, one I am not familiar with nor have I ever seen before. The images became too much for my mind after a time that I simply blacked out.”  
  
“Spock, if you could find something that resembled what you saw in the database is it possible for you to draw a correlation from the species you saw in the images to one of which exists presently that maybe related in some way?”  
  
“It is possible however I am not for certain.” Spock stated.  
  
“Well, try your best Spock, it may lead us to who is behind all of this.” Jim replied.

 

 

 

**BLUE_MEETS_GREEN**


	9. Dinner is served

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spock considers an alternative that Jim would not approve of while Bones gives out some much needed advice before the main event of dinner with the Ambassador (Emissary) begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about my long absence. I had not planned on staying away from updating but it was difficult to get into the mood to write while in pain from a knee injury. I am finally on the mend and walking on my own... plus I can drive now. Damn I missed driving. On a good note, Today marks my 50th birthday.

Spock had spent little time viewing the database of records which Starfleet had amassed on the different lifeforms known in existence. It was what humans would call a small gamble however Spock would not go against the Captain's advisement in this matter. He knew it would seem prudent not to go against Jim in a manner that suggested otherwise.  
  
Seeing his mate at his side in Medical and hearing the words spoken gave Spock a feeling of aspiration. It was hope that Jim still held longing for him despite his recent behavior toward the human. Trying not to dwell on the past, he focused on what the future would hold for them.  


With their five year mission coming to a close in a year's time, it would stand to reason the couple needed to decide which route to take in their lives together. Spock desired to work on New Vulcan knowing his counterpart's days would be coming to a close while Jim showed interest in serving at Yorktown. How could they remain at each others side in this manner?  


Jim expressed a desire to be formally bonded. It was something the young cadet in Kirk would have been shy about. Knowing his mate carried much of his insecurities about his life as a child and youth affected their relationship during their academy days. Jim had grown as a person in those years as a Captain and Spock believed he owed his mate an explanation as to why he had been distancing himself all these months. Perhaps his elder counterpart was correct,  Jim deserved to make his own choice in this. Spock decided he would make an attempt at rectifying the problem by opening the bonds of communication between himself and his mate. There would be no barriers between them any longer.

As he begins to access the files, he becomes discouraged at the lack of information even with the use of the ship's computer analysis of the description Spock provided from his accounts of the images. Most of his recollection is fuzzy at best, Spock then considers the alternative. Surely no harm could befall him if he sets computer safety protocols in place.  
  
Without notifying the Captain or anyone, Spock attempts contact with the artifact once again.

 

  
\+         +         +  
  
  


Jim sat by the doctor' desk in Medical watching as Bones wrote in his medical logs. McCoy knew most officers used visual logs but the country doctor in him preferred writing or at least typing in his findings on recent annual physicals given to several crewmen that day.  
  
For being James T. Kirk, you're awfully quiet. Anything stewing in that noggin' you call a brain..? Captain…”  
  
Jim twiddles his thumbs looking less like the confident captain of a star ship and more like a young man filled with uncertainty.

“Bones…”

“Yes Jim.”

“When you were married when did you know it was really over?”

“When my wife filed for divorce. Why?”

“No Bones, I mean didn't you see any signs she wasn't happy? Some how long ago didn't you noticed the way you knew her feelings for you had changed?”

“I suppose I would have seen it coming if I was at home with Jocelyn, but I was busying getting my medical practice started in Georgia. At first things were good, real good and when our sweet daughter came into the mix I thought I had won the lottery. Somehow I think we became too busy with our own lives to see we were drifting apart... well that and I think Jocelyn wasn't happy in Georgia.”  


“So you think maybe Spock and I have drifted apart?”  
  
“Now I wouldn't go so far as to say that Jim. Look, I don't know much about Vulcan's and their emotional state. I doubt Spock feels any less love for you than he did in your academy days, granted you both have the added pressure most couples don't have being a command team but I think you and Spock have done a great job balancing your lives as star fleet officers and maintaining a relationship. Don't tell the green hobgoblin I said that, I have a reputation to maintain with Spock and most of crew around here.”  
  
“I supposed you're right.”  
  
McCoy smiles, “You mean you agree with me on my opinion?”  
  
Jim takes a shot of liquor, wincing as it goes down his throat. 'Nope, I just agree it's best I don't old tell Spock you really admire him.”  
  
Punching Jim on his shoulder, “Hey don't drink all the bottle. I was saving some for our next stop at Risa. Jim, I had plans with that!”

“The operative word was 'had' Bones.” He tells his friend as he sticks out his tongue.  
  
Jim adds, “Right now I have a lot if questions unanswered. Some of which are by my Vulcan boyfriend plus this whole Fibonan Republic and Teeenaxi fiasco. I don't where to begin and I sure am not going to face Adren and Spock in the same room sober.

“So it is true?” Bones smirks.

“What's true?”

“That the Ambassador is an old dalliance of yours.”

Jim blushes. “Um.. yes we dated briefly while I was in high school back in Iowa. His family was touring the ship yards, I was one of the students assigned to host a tour of the Riverside. He was a gentleman most of the time.”  
  
Raising an eyebrow in a poor imitation of Commander Spock, “Captain, it would seem you have noted there have been other instances where the Ambassador was not a gentleman.”  
  
“Hey I don't kiss and tell Bones and that is a poor job of pretending to be Spock.” Jim laughs.  
  
“Well kid, you best be getting yourself ready for dinner with your man and Ambassador. I would love to be a fly on the wall to see it.”  
  
“Oh you'll do more than see Bones, all senior officers will be present.”  
  
'Damn it Jim.” Bones huffs. 'I am a doctor not a hostess.”  
  
“Well, you could have fooled me with that Southern charm.” Jim grins as he exits Medical.   
  
  
  
  
\+        +        +

 

All senior officers were present, excluding Commander Spock. Jim tried not to show his concern but he was worried about why Spock had not arrived.  It was unlike him to disregard Star Fleet protocol in dealing with foreign dignitaries.  
  
Pulling his collar of his dress uniform, “Well, Jim where's your half?' Bones drawls.  
  
He whispers back, 'Don't you mean my better half Bones?”  
  
'Nope, can say that I do. Not when it comes to his behavior recently. Look I can over look some things about Spock but not when he manhandles my Captain or does not show up for this shindig. If I had to get in my dress uniform and show up, Spock needs to also.”

'Will you lower your voice Bones?”  
  
'What for, this Ambassador hasn't even shown up himself. When he does, I'll behave. Don't you worry about me Jim. Spock is the one you need to worry about.”  
  
As soon as the words are spoken, the Emissary is escorted by two crewmen into the room. Jim swallows whatever worries he has about Spock and hopes his Commanding officer (and boyfriend) has a good reason for not showing up.        

 

 

BLUE_MEETS_GREEN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this little morsel before some shit hits the fan in the next chapter. I originally planned for more Spock but I needed the tension and build being set for the next chapter.


	10. Absence of Limitations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dinner with the Ambassador (Emissary) goes smoothly until something makes its presence known.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I sat “on the fence” deciding which direction to take this chapter in the story, let's hope I made the right decision.

The formal affair of entertaining the Ambassador despite his first officer's disappearance seemed far easier than Jim had first imagined. The Ambassador was polite and courteous, showing no signs he noted Commander Spock's absence not even to the crew...especially the Captain.  
  
Nyota nodded as she engaged in conversation with the doctor, who seemed concerned that Spock had not made his appearance.  
  
“Damn green blooded...” Hissing under his breath.

Placing her hand on his forearm, “Doctor, it does no one any good to get upset over things we have no control over. The Captain is handling himself well during these proceedings and I have confidence he will be able to carry out the talks as scheduled.”  
  
Pulling at the collar of his dress uniform, “Look it's not that I don't trust Jim, I know the kid can get the job done. It's just Spock is not making things any better not showing up. He is always the one to regard Star fleet regulations and for him not to be here.. well it is in no way a good reflection on the crew especially to our esteemed guest.”  
  
'Why don't you let Ambassador Troi be the judge of that.” Nyota counters.

Lieutenant Commander Scott interrupts as he makes his way to the pair, “Och aye, I'd have to agree with Lieutenant Uhura. The Ambassador looks like he's as pleased as a pea in a blether with the Captain given his body language dinnae you think?”  
  
Taking a sip of his wine, “Yeah well if he seems in a good mood, the man is probably enjoying Jim all to himself. I hate to say this but I would rather have Spock here at this moment than witness that locust of a man hoovering over Jim like he was a crop field.”  
  
Scott almost burst out loud trying to contain his laughter. McCoy turns suddenly, “And what pray tell you you think is so funny about this situation?”  
  
“Nothing Doctor, but you called the Ambassador a locust. Didnae you know that's an edible pod of some plants in the pea family, damn thing resembles a locust.”

Nyota giggles quietly. “If I did not know any better, I would say Dr. McCoy has taken on the mantle of being Jim's protector while Commander Spock is absent.”  
  
“Well someone has to be, damn kid gets himself in more messes than a my beloved hound dog Rufus when we were potty training him back in the day.”

  
Clearing her throat, “That may have been well in his youth and maybe during our academy days but Jim has matured though the years as a seasoned Star Fleet officer. I think we should give him the benefit of the doubt he can handle the Emissary.”  
  
“I hope you are right for Jim's sake.” McCoy draws as he sips his wine observing his best friend.

  
  
+       +       +

 

The heat was unbearable, the air around Spock felt if he was still in the volcano on Nibiru before he was rescued. His thoughts are clouded as he tries to maneuver around the images the artifact shows him in his mind.  
  
At first he believed the images to belong to the original owner of the artifact. He realizes the object is showing him where it has been and all who have encountered it. While some would consider it dismaying, the Vulcan finds the information enlightening. The artifact itself is a library of sorts, keeping a record of the past. Spock makes note to mention the information to the Captain but not before he gains further knowledge about what the images may represent.

Images of the Fibonan Republic come to view, he sees how the breakdown of its society came to be, then destruction and near completed annihilation of the population. As Spock navigates through the past as it is presented to him, he is surprised to learn the Fibonans were never the original species who discovered it. It was stolen by the Fibonans a millennia ago, using it as they saw fit never realizing its true purpose.  
  
_“What was its true purpose?” _Spock thought._  
  
The artifact senses Spock's thoughts and answers in the language of his people... the mother tongue of Vulcan in his mind._

____

“ _You seek the truth young-ling.”_  
  
_“How is this possible?”_ Spock thinks.  
  
_“It is not beyond the understanding of most sentient beings. Your consciousness called out to us. We responded.”_  
  
_“Are you a past representation of those who created this device?”_ Spock states.

“ _We are the remenant of those who have left an imprint to guide those who seek the truth...”_  
  
_“I wish to now why you have chosen this period of time to reveal this? Why not speak to the others?”_  
  
_“We have found most species who have encountered the artifact as self indulgent, seeking only their desires.”_ The artifact explained.  
  
Spock considered his next train of thought before proceeding, if he should show any signs of choosing questions that would only serve his purpose he believed the artifact would not go further in communication.  
  
_“You hesitate, for what purpose?”_ It asked. **  
**  
' _”I merely wish to consider my questions carefully.”_ Spock clarified.

__

_“You misunderstand Vulcan, your questions must come from your katra. You must let go of any fears you have and allow us entry into your consciousness so that we may know what it is you seek.”_  
  
Spock closes his eyes and begins to meditate the ancient Vulcan way. He clears any thoughts he has on the surface and accepts... "Kaiidth,what is...is..." He speaks.  
  
Instantly, Spock is bombarded by images of Vulcan, of Surak himself then the pre-reform society of Vulcan. He gasps....   
  
         
   

+       +        +  
  
  
  
Meanwhile, all of the senior crew have dispersed to the quarters, save McCoy. The big brother extinct in him over Jim carried into the evening, noting the behavior of the man before Jim. Ambassador or not, Bones would have given the man a Georgia hook in the jaw even if it meant losing his medical license.  
  
Jim felt the eyes of Bones on his neck like a vice and could not blame his friend for watching over him. His thoughts quickly went to Spock and for a moment Jim felt stifling hot.  
  
Bones noticed and quickly went to Jim's side. 'You okay there Jim?”  
  
“Yeah, I am fine. I guess the wine got to me but I am okay.”  
  
“You sure kid?'

“Yes, call it a night and go to your quarters Dr. McCoy. That's an order.”  
  
“Captain it was a pleasure getting acquainted with you again. I must retire myself. If you'll excuse me gentlemen.” The Ambassador confesses.  
  
As McCoy leaves the banquet room, Jim sits down wondering what Spock never showed up. He feels deflated and defeated, not understanding Spock's behavior. He tells himself, when this situation between the Teenaxi and Fibonans is over he will contact Selik to question him about his Spock and why he has distanced himself so.  
  
Before Jim gets up to leave for his quarters, a hand lays on his shoulder.  
  
“Spock you better have a good reason why you did not attend the evening's festivities.”  
  
Jim turns around only to see the Ambassador looking at him longingly.

“That Vulcan of yours is a fortunate man, if you were mine I would not let you leave my sight.”  
  
“Adren, you chose to follow a different path... mine was to follow the stars and explore.” Jim expressed.  
  
“And mine was to bridge the gap between species.” Adren added.  
  
Lifting Jim's face, “Had I truly known what I was giving up, I would not have lost you...”  
  
“Well Adren we came from two very different worlds, I was a kid from Iowa with nothing to my name but my father's legacy and you held the honor as a diplomat's son.”  
  
“Still James you choose the son of an Ambassador, did you not?”

“Adren, that was then, I had not expected to find love.. instead it found me with Spock. I have never looked back and I have no regrets of where I am now. I think we both made the right decision then, I have Star Fleet and you have your position as Ambassador.”  
  
“Even so, I see the doubt in your eyes.” Adren huffs.  
  
“What you see my friend is the frustration of dealing with this matter between the Teenaxi and Fibonans.” Jim barks back.  
  
Shaking his head, “James you would have me believe you hold no feelings for me after those months together. We spoke of promises and dreams.”  
  
“You can't keep thinking about what could have been or should have been in your eyes Adren. We were kids then...”  
  
“Why not? You know I find it surprising your Vulcan had no knowledge of me or our past together. Would he still find you a precious gift if he knew...”  
  
Jim rises from his chair despite the dizziness he feels in his head. “I wasn't hiding my past from Spock, he knows about my childhood and my experiences on Tarsus.”  
  
“But you never told him about our bethrothal, we were to be married James.”

“Adren, I was too young and confused. You took advantage of that, it was a mistake. We were both luckly your parents discovered our plans and put a stop to it before we both would do something we'd regret.”  
  
“James I still care for you...”  
  
“Adren, I love Spock and the knowledge you hold affection for me after all these years holds nothing for me.  I am sorry Adren, Spock is my Th'y'la, he is my husband, my soul mate in every sense of the word. I would never let that go.”  
  
Stepping in front of Jim, “Oh but you have considered it, things between you and your intended have not been well. You have questions and it pains you that he will not answer them.”  
  
“Adren enough of your empathetic abilities, you have no right to invade my thoughts and emotions!”

“I promised myself I would not contact you all these years. I kept in touch with what the media had disclosed when Nero invaded the quadrant. It wasn't until I found out about your death...”  
  
“That was classified, if you used your abilities to discover what you could Adren. It was wrong!” Jim exclaimed. “Is that what you are doing here on behalf of the Teenaxi?”  
  
“No Jim, I only accessed your feelings this evening, I could not help myself. Please Jim forgive me.”  
  
Just as Adren asks for forgiveness, he presses his lips against Jim's as a Vulcan roar is heard in the distance.....

 

 

 

**BLUE_MEETS_GREEN**

 

**  
**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't you just love cliffhangers? I had to end the chapter with some suspense so bare with me. Now we now why Jim never told Spock about Adren. 
> 
> translation of Scottish words:  
> Och aye – Oh yes  
> blether – adjective as in a talkative person  
> noun - chat


	11. In the Eye of the Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim remembers the past during the present and the future becomes very dangerous indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We get a glimpse of a very young Jim and his first love before it hits him in the face.

  
  
They say in the eye of the storm, it is peaceful. Everything is at a lull and it seems too perfect. One would not expect the outside of the eye to be a chasm of chaos, but that was where Jim found himself.  
  
For a brief moment Adren's lips met his, Jim was reminded of his life as a youth and the promise of young love.  
  


_**Twelve years earlier....**_  
  
  
_At age sixteen, Jim looked much younger than his peers. He would be seventeen in a few weeks and he had hoped his boyish looks would have faded by now. He is tall and lanky and looks like a child more than a junior in high school. His shyness is hidden behind his constant need for risk taking, hiding his fear behind danger._  
  
_There are few who can see behind Jim's mask so he never worries about what others see in him or think of for that matter. That is until James T. Kirk met Adren Divian Troi from Betazed, Riverside high school's newest student._  
  
_Adren arrived with his family to Riverside, it was Jim who was chosen to represent the school by providing escort around the city for the family and a tour of the campus. Jim was not pleased to handle this assignment but he accepted it hoping it would add to his application when he sought acceptance into college or possibly Starfleet Academy._

 _Jim pulled the tie which pressed against his neck. He was uncomfortable and hoped his nervousness would not show. He heard about Betazoids being telepathic and the last thing he needed was someone reading his mind, his thoughts thus learning his fears and the mask he hid behind._  
  
_Spending the better part of a week reading on techniques on which to block one from reading his thoughts, Jim is convinced he can pull it off._

  
_After being introduced to the Troi family and showing them the sights of Riverside, Jim feels more confident in his duty as guide. While the Ambassador and his wife did not speak, they seem pleased with the tour. Jim had recalled some Betazoids preferred to communicate telepathically even though they were among non-telepaths. While it seemed rude, Jim was relieved he did not have to answer any personal questions about himself. He remained the polite guide through the tour of the city and school campus. That is until a voice from the vehicle spoke after Ambassador and his wife exited to retire for the evening._  
  
_“You know you could do well to keep your thoughts to yourself, did anyone ever tell you that you broadcast loudly. Talk about giving a guy a headache.” The youngest member of the Troi family announced before leaving to follow his parents._

 _Turning toward Adren. “You are wrong, I know for a fact I didn't. From what I have seen, your parents gave no indication they could read my thoughts. Besides I read up on some techniques to block anyone from...”_  
  
_Laughing, “An account no doubt by the only race who can boast they can block telepaths...Tellarites.”_  
  
_Cursing as he tosses his P.A.D.D. onto the floor of the transport vehicle, “Damn it, I should have known.”_  
  
_“Come now James, allow me to teach you how to correctly block your thoughts from others. I have a feeling we are going to be good friends.” Adren smiled._  
  
_It wasn't long after several weeks, the two became inseparable. Jim found himself falling for the handsome Betazoid. Adren felt the same way for Jim. They had been secretly involved on a relationship for the better part of six months. Both realized they could not stand the idea of being apart once it came time for the Troi family to return to Betazed the following year. It was Adren who proposed the idea of marriage and Jim agreed._  
  
_Adren stood by Jim's side as he presented a charm which signified the colors of his family's house on Betazed. This was first step in their betrothal and for Jim this was the happiest day of his young life. They kissed under an Oak tree, promising to spend the rest of their lives together...._  
  
  
**Present day...** **  
**

__  
_ _

Jim knew it was wrong in hesitating to push Adren away. Part of him wanted to forget the mess he was in with the Teenaxi and Fibonan Republic, the other wanted to push Spock in a corner, force the Vulcan's hand to come sort of decision about their future.  
  
For that moment, Jim felt peace but he knew it was short lived. In an instant the wrath of jealous mate pulled Jim away knocking him unconscious against the wall as Spock descended upon the Betazoid.  
  
Adren knew he was playing with fire when he chose to make advances on Jim. His love for the young Captain never faded over time. Adren still held hope that one day he could convince Jim to give him another chance. It was a mistake giving in to his parents' decision that he should chose a life of service to his people rather than a life with Jim. Now it was too late to turn back, what's done is done.  
  
Shielding his body against the blows of a Vulcan became difficult and Adren's only option was using the only strength he has to his advantage... his mind. He had to force the Vulcan to stop so that they could see if Jim was unharmed.  
  
Telepathically speaking to Spock did nothing but serve to anger the Vulcan even more. Adren tried repeated to convince Spock he was wrong and would back away showing Spock was the victor and mate to Jim.  
  
The Betazoid was suddenly convinced he was dealing with something other than Spock. He had dealt with the Vulcan mind before and considered the difference was due to Spock being half Vulcan; however Adren felt emotions that no Vulcan ever expressed except during the period before Surak based on what he read in ancient studies.

 ** _“Spock you must tend to your mate, he has been harmed.”_** Adren pushed through the Vulcan's mind.  
  
**“You lie, you are the deceiver. You wish to take what is mine!”**  
  
**_“I thought you did not love James. I wanted what was taken from me years ago but I have come to realize James was never truly mine. We were very young and James was impressionable, I was the elder between us and I took what was fancy for love.”_** Adren confesses.  


Pushing Adren out from the recesses of his mind, Spock breaks free. Adren falls back.  
  
“By Ancient Vulcan law, I have the right to call upon kal-if-fee.” Spock exclaimed.  
  
“You will do nothing of the sort Spock.” Jim called out as he rose to a sitting position.  
  
“Jim are you alright?” Adren looked concerned.  
  
“You will not speak to my mate!”  
  
“Damn it Spock, I can speak to whomever I want. You know it was a mistake on Adren's part, heck maybe mine too!”  
  
Spock turned to Jim. The Vulcan's breathing was labored, his thoughts jumbled. All Spock could see was his anger and his desire to take Jim right there where he sat regardless of who was in the room. Spock's body called for him to claim Jim in all ways and he found it difficult to listen to any reason.

Spock listen to me.” Jim softly spoke. I am sorry, I knew Adren still cared for me. I wasn't surprised by his behavior, in fact I kept myself on guard expecting him to convince me I was in a loveless relationship with you. What I did not count on was you not showing up when I needed you here. I was angry and I felt so alone, Adren must have picked up my emotions this evening and assumed he had a chance so he took it.”  
  
“How are you to blame for this?” Spoke questioned his mate.  
  
Jim rubbed his hands together, tears streaming down his face. “Ever since I came back from death, I held on to life but apparently I could not hold your favor Spock. In the months since I awakened from that coma, I saw the dying of my relationship with you. I thought at first it was something I did but no I am sure of it... it's you. You pushed me away little by little until I convinced myself I could love for the both of us. I can't do it anymore, not like this.”  
  
“Lies all lies!” Spock countered.  
  
“So when Adren kissed me, I felt peace for the first time in months and was reminded of my youth in Riverside. I know it was wrong to hesitate in pushing Adren's advances away, believe I am sorry in that regard but I can stop living a lie that everything between us is right when clearly it isn't.”  
  
“I will not hear of this, you will wait in our quarters while I deal with this man. It is my right to call upon kal-if-fee. He challenges my right to you by his very existence!”  
  
“Damn you Spock, I am your commanding officer and as Captain I order you to the brig.”

"You have no authority over Vulcan law, as my intended you must await my victory so that I shall claim what is rightfully mine.”  
  
Jim realizes Spock has plans to fight Adren regardless. Jim knows kal-if-fee is to the death. He carefully considers what to do now... _Where's Bones and his hypos when you need them?_

 

**BLUE_MEETS_GREEN**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't claim to know much about kal-if-fee other than what I have seen in TOS so I went with the idea calling on kal-if-fee could be addressed by either party in the relationship. Spock calling for a fight to the death to rid him of any competition for Jim's attention.


	12. Facetious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bones does some quick thinking to help Jim in a funny sort way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a love for science so I chose a strange yet scientific manner by which Bones steps in.

 

Dr. McCoy had been sitting in his office, he couldn't sleep. A part of him wanted to check in on Jim. He knew leaving his Captain and best friend alone with the Ambassador was not a good one, however Bones trusted Jim even if he didn't trust the Adren.

Pouring a drink, the doctor tells himself Jim is a man who can handle his own demons. Just when he is about to take a swig from his glass, the communication panel light appears. Hitting the panel while swearing Jim knows just when to bother him but before he can answer the communication panel, he hears an exchange of words between Spock and Jim.  
  


Bones listens in, realizing his friend must have struck the panel letting the doctor to be apprise of the situation.

“…you pushed me away little by little until I convinced myself I could love for the both of us. I can't do this anymore, not like this.” Jim's voice utters.   
  


“Lies all lies!” Spock counters.”

Immediately after hearing Spock, the doctor mutes his end, “Computer locate the Captain and First Officer.”  
  
Its response, “They are located on deck 12 Promenade Room.”   
  
“Are they alone?”   
  
“Negative, there are three individuals present, the Captain, First Officer and Ambassador Trio. The Ambassador has suffered some minor abrasions as well a fractured wrist. The Captain is uninjured. ” it states.   
  
“Great all I need is a back seat computer to tell me what designates as my job. “ Bones mumbles to himself. “Computer scan First Officer and detect any anomalies.”  
  


“Readings detect high levels of serotonin and noradrenaline. Limbic system as well as Hippo-campus have been affected. Increased levels of Vulcan blood cells in lower region of....”   
  
Bones calls, “ENOUGH! I get it, our green blooded friend here wants to get it on with his mate and he is an agitated state.”   
  
Bones listens into the conversion as he continues. He knows help can't reach Jim in time so he enters in some computations on what can affect each of the individuals in the room without further injury.   
  
“Computer lists affects of Nitrous Oxide” on Vulcans.”  
  
“Vulcans have the inability to metabolize nitrous oxide. After 3.37 minutes of exposure to the gas, a Vulcan will pass out.“   
  
“Great now we'll have a laughing human and Betazoid, one knocked out Vulcan. Computer calculate weight of each individual taking in necessary measurement of gas to fill the area, then release.”  
  


As the gas is slowly released, the doctor informs security personnel to equip themselves with the necessary precautions not to be affected by the gas as well as carrying a standard phaser set to stun. Entering the turbo lift, McCoy hopes his friend will understand.   
  
  
  
+       +      +

 

 

Meanwhile in the room, as Jim is secretly wishing Bones and his hypos were here. Jim hoped McCoy got the hint when he pressed the intercom letting Bones listen to the conversation. Part of Jim wished his words had not been said but he had enough of what was transpiring between Spock and himself. He did not want to admit it but as he spoke the words he realized it was over between him and Spock.   
  
He looks over to the Ambassador for any signs of injury. He knows a Betazoid is not as strong or dense as a Vulcan's body. Adren's only strength is his mind, Jim hopes Adren was able to reach Spock in some way to detour any violence between the two from occurring.   
  
Suddenly Jim begins to giggle, he doesn't know why. Adren begins to smile and Jim tries to realize why. He looks to Spock who is still in a toxic state, a mixture of anger and arousal as Jim can see from the tenting in Spock's lower region.   
  
Jim swallows what is left of his spirit, trying to move but before he can maneuver around Spock, the Vulcan grabs his throat lifting Jim into the air.   
  
“Why do you persist in trying end our relationship? Must I prove myself to you yet again.”   
  
Shaking his head as he holds his mate. “You are mine! I will not allow another to take what is mine nor will I allow you separate yourself from what has been destined to be. We are Th'y'la, you know this to be true. Why would you give up such a gift?”  
  


Jim tries to speak but cannot, he knows he has seconds before he passes out. Spock loosens his grip as Jim begins to laugh.   
  
“Why do you mock me Jim?”   
  
“I'm not it's..” Jim smiles trying not to laugh yet again. He realizes must be a gas released in the room. He thinks to himself. _“Way to go there Bones, what timing.”_   
  
Soon Adren begins to laugh as well. It further infuriates Spock and he growls at the Betazoid. “Shall I kill him Ashayam? Let his skull be crushed by my bare hands. No! He will watch as I claim what is rightfully mine!”   
  
“Spock No!”   
  


Adren calls out, “Commander you are an officer of Starfleet, as well   
as a Vulcan scientist, adhering to the laws which govern you. Jim is your superior officer. Your behavior constitutes disrespect to him, Starfleet as well as your people.”   
  
Spock pauses, considering the Ambassador's words. Confusion sinks in and then Jim cries out as Spock tilts his head and sinks in his teeth into his neck. Jim's heart races and he thinks of what to do.   
  
“Spock please let me go!”   
  
“Never!”   
  
Just then Spock hold begins to weaken, the Vulcan passes out releasing Jim as the Captain falls to the ground unconscious.

  
  


**BLUE_MEETS_GREEN**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I found the information on Vulcan Physiology at startrekfreedom.com. One weakness of the Vulcans is their inability to metabolize Nitrous oxide (laughing gas). Who knew? 
> 
> Kudos and Comments are appreciated


End file.
